I have been thinking this for as long as I can remember now - and trying very hard. But being better, not forgetting so much, not making so many mistakes, seeing the world more clearly through other's eyes, seems as elusive as catching the brightness at the end of the rainbow. Some of you are so kind and think what I do is good and the books are lovely, and I worry so much that if ever I forget to send you something I promised, or don't reply quickly, or you receive a wrong order, that you will be more than disappointed. You will not only be disappointed with me, quite justly, but you will be disappointed with all the good aims we are trying to foster, with all the heart we have put into our products every single hour of every single day for the last 5 years. And more - that you will lose heart in believing that things can be good, and with persevering in all the good things you try to do, trying to be that bit better every day, as I try, and often, fail to be. Believe in perfection, certainly, try for perfection, look for perfection, foster perfection and when you experience less than perfection, don't let it turn your whole world grey. Compassion is the eye of the rainbow, its colours and brightness dazzle, remain with you all your life and never fade. I am just like you at heart. A little girl, who tries to walk in dreams that perhaps are too large for her feet and trip her up sometimes.
Thursday, 8 October 2009
I Wish I Could Be Better
I have been thinking this for as long as I can remember now - and trying very hard. But being better, not forgetting so much, not making so many mistakes, seeing the world more clearly through other's eyes, seems as elusive as catching the brightness at the end of the rainbow. Some of you are so kind and think what I do is good and the books are lovely, and I worry so much that if ever I forget to send you something I promised, or don't reply quickly, or you receive a wrong order, that you will be more than disappointed. You will not only be disappointed with me, quite justly, but you will be disappointed with all the good aims we are trying to foster, with all the heart we have put into our products every single hour of every single day for the last 5 years. And more - that you will lose heart in believing that things can be good, and with persevering in all the good things you try to do, trying to be that bit better every day, as I try, and often, fail to be. Believe in perfection, certainly, try for perfection, look for perfection, foster perfection and when you experience less than perfection, don't let it turn your whole world grey. Compassion is the eye of the rainbow, its colours and brightness dazzle, remain with you all your life and never fade. I am just like you at heart. A little girl, who tries to walk in dreams that perhaps are too large for her feet and trip her up sometimes.
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What brought out such a post. You are one of the most helpful, very informative blogs on stitching and embroidery! I like you just the way you are, and am sure there are others who will agree with me. And ppl who have known you (through your blog for instance), will not be disappointed, at least not for long. To err is human, ...
ReplyDeleteI know this is my first time here, so hello. I love reading your blog, and have been a follower for several months now. I could not let you feel 'lonely, desolate' (whatever you call it - but these are what come to my mind as i read and re-read your blog), after all the happiness you have brought to us stitchers. I have got sucked into the Mary Wigham world, she is waiting for me to complete my current WIPs!
Is that you in your younger days!! Very charming
Take care
*Hugs to you and your li'l girl self*
Sharmila
A lovely picture, lovely dreaming eyes. Keep walking, Jacqueline, you're doing fine, and thank you for that.
ReplyDeleteJacqueline, Please don't ever worry about disappointing anyone. My goodness, we are all human and make mistakes. I am amazed and excited about all the wonderful information and charts that you have worked so tirelessly in accumulating. If someone has written something hurtful, that is their problem, not yours. Perfection is divine, not earthly. Continue your wonderful work and know that you are appreciated and admired.
ReplyDeleteYou are such a dear! We are all human, many of us have large dreams, and sometimes we trip over our good intentions. I do not know what is behind your post, but please know that I, among hundreds, if not thousands of others, have great regard for you. I respect the work you do, and this blog has been terrific. You live large in my heart. Carolyn
ReplyDeleteI'm dismayed to read your post today. It seems that You have lost "heart in believing that things can be good", not your friends who read your blog. You must remember the joy you bring to all of us, not the someone or something that has made you feel badly. You always brighten my day and inspire me to want to learn more about the world we live in. You enrich all our lives, never forget that, and remember all the contributions you have made to make "things good". I hope you can feel all the hugs we are sending your way. Pat
ReplyDeleteI don`t know why you would feel this way Jacqueline, but I think you are a wonderful kind caring person who has a strong passion for history and needlework. I am very happy I found this site, and I feel like I have found a kindred spirit in my love of samplers. You go above and beyond the call to help us and make us so happy with the things you provide. I am constantly singing the praises of both you and this site.Be assured, if you do indeed 'trip up', we will forgive you for being less than perfect. That`s what friends do!
ReplyDeleteDitto to all above. Your blog and work is an inspiration to us all. I look forward to it every evening to help me unwind and center myself after a crazy day.
ReplyDeleteOh, Jacqueline, this brought tears to my eyes - I know what you mean, as I do try so hard, too, and fall so short of the mark so often. Memory, especially, plagues me these days - I used to be so bright! :-/
ReplyDeleteYou are loved and admired by so many - people are constantly talking about how beautiful this blog is, and how much you do. We will not be disappointed to find out you're just like us! Each day, we try our best, and each day brings new challenges, but you are doing a wonderful job!
Please take care of yourself - don't work so hard, take time to relax and pamper yourself a little.
I love your photo - what a lovely little girl! Her eyes smiling up at us gave me a lift today!
Julie
Dear Jacqueline,
ReplyDeleteI bless you for the joy and beauty you bring so many people.
I bless you for the worldwide network you and Mary Wigham have initiated.
I bless you for your generosity and gentle eloquence.
I hold you up in prayer in the expectation that you will forgive yourself just as you surely forgive others.
And the people say "Amen".
I was watching the TV programme the other evening "The Pride of Britain Awards" - if they gave them for needlework you would certainly receive on of the Lifetime Achievement Awards! Keep doing what you do and know that although many of us cannot post or be in touch often, you are always in our thoughts and the blog provides a beacon of light in the busy and stressful lives we lead. A big 'group hug' to you! Susan
ReplyDeleteHi Jacqueline. First of all CHEER UP!!! I do not know what is behind your post but What ever it is do not worry. We are human beings and for that reason we make mistakes.
ReplyDeleteI love your blog, I am an everyday follower,and of course your work.
For what I know from you, you are a very kind and warm person.As I said before Cheer up!! Do not feel blue It is just autumn season blues.Love from Spain.
Jacqueline,
ReplyDeleteYou do not need to be better. We love you just the way you are.
You brighten my life each day with your blog and your work is much admired.
Love,
Peg
I think that we all feel that way to one degree or another... but you are exceptional in your desire to gather, compile, share... and you do it well.
ReplyDeleteWhat you have created here is an amazing gift for anyone passionate about needlework. I am constantly inspired by the material and resources that you have gathered. Thank you so very much!
i think we all have these moments of wondering if what we do and who we hope we are is enough for all. i believe that we want to please and yet we know we can't always accomplish that for everyone. i am always amazed how one bad comment can send me over and yet knowing all along that i have many friends who believe in me. i love this blog and i think the work you have done is over the top and if my one comment helps on those extra hard days then believe that you have contributed more than you probably know.thank you for all that you share.
ReplyDeleteDear Jacqueline, I think we are all little girls at heart, on the outside we are women, in the inside we are all vulnerable children. Even men who try to be so brave, are all little boys at heart. Children that have matured, but still children. I think you do a wonderful thing, and I love your blog, it cheers me up. And I'm sure if all the little girls that have stitched the samplers from the past, could speak, I'm sure they would all be very proud of the good work you do, so that they may not be forgotten. Love and thanks, Julia Arnold
ReplyDeleteWhen I was organizing the special Goodhart Samplers Book Launch last year I told one poor guest she was to be in the annexe...I had it in my head that that is exactly where she should be. Fortunately, the dear guest who is the kindest person sent me a copy of an email I had sent to her not long before which categorically stated she would NOT be in the annexe. Now I know some of you are well aquainted with what the inside of my head looks like on a busy day. Sometimes I am told off by those who yet to meet me and reminded that I am a 'Publisher' - ah...if only I had a 'Publisher's' brain to put on though! I think somehow I am stuck with Jacqueline's...
ReplyDeleteComing back to the dear Montacute guest - it is Karen you will be able to thank in a couple of weeks' time for a new free Infinity download.
I hope you are feeling much better. I just am reading the post and catching up. I've always been very impressed by your degree of intelligence about needleart,your blog, and I think it's great the way it is.
ReplyDeleteThere are always one or two or even three who are not pleased or find complaint in anything.
Just think this as not a reflection of you but of themselves. So, cheer up and just be who you are. Your kindness in your heart shines through!
Jennifer Dalenberg
North Georgia, USA
Feathers in the Nest
Dear Jacqueline, I am new to Quaker cross stitching and found your blog today. Just reading your post brought tears to my eyes, and the dear photo of you as a little girl. I had put one on my blog recently ~ I am also new to blogging. From what I can see your blog is so informative and I look forward to down loading some patterns soon ~ just trying to work out what to start with first! You sound like the most lovely kind hearted and thoughful lady. Thank you from me for your informative needlework. Ann from Australia.
ReplyDelete